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3.01.2007

a sense of belonging

I dropped by my former school's campus after a cup of coffee with some officemates. There has actually been a lot that has changed--more commercial establishments, new buildings, and faces I barely recognize. Basically, everything new, except for the memories that I kept. There wasn't any sting of nostalia whatsoever, but I just realized how I seem not to fit in it anymore. For the first time, it dawned to me that I no longer belong here. Even if the environment still seems to welcome me, I knew I should be somewhere else. Finally, I have grown from the school girl that I was to a more mature woman that I am now.

I have practically grown up in UST, not mention I was born there. And even though I deny it, it has shaped me who I am. Am proud to be Thomasian and a Dominican at that. However, a year of being detached from "home", gave me new eyes to see with--a new sense of being. My experience outside the confined walls of my alma mater gave me a broader vision of things, which made me appreciate life better. I realized that life is sweeter when you dare to taste it's bitterness; that when you dare what you think weakens you, you eventually becomes strong; that strangers can be nicer than I had perceived them to be. When I sent myself out of the shelter of my university campus, it meant a great deal to me. I was REALLY out of it. All these years, I thought that life is all about my university and what's happening in it . I failed to see what is beyond. I failed to see reality. All these years, my university life was reality--a reality which I kept so dear, that I actually do not want to let go of. Memories that I relieve now and ever. However, in life, everything just keeps on changing. I was afraid, but I knew my visit tonight assured me that I am ready to move out there. UST is sending me out with all its blessings, knowing that I was groomed to be great, because she prepared me to be one. I hope not to fail her.

I knew that I belonged in the school I practically lived in. But now, I realized I belong to a bigger world. Much more than the perimeter of my university campus. I now am growing up.

2 comments:

Roan Marbert said...

you're right. there's a part in our lives where we have to leave the place that we considered home. what's a school if you don't step out of it's four walls and show the world how it has molded you? i give my deepest gratitude for making us a part of your journey.

jishinka said...

Thank you too for making it sweet and beautiful. You guys indeed painted rainbows in my sky. Love you...