steven curtis chapman live in manila

I can't wait till it's Saturday. =) I will be seeing Steven Curtis Chapman perform live again!

For most people who doesn't know, Steven is the composer/singer of the hit "I Will Be Here". (No guys, it isn't a Gary V. song...Sorry!) He is a contemporary Christian musician and he won five Grammy's already. How is that? =)

I first time I saw him perform was last year in a concert organized by FISH Magazine (thanks to George. Hehe.) I loved him from then and of course the songs! Steven loves to tell stories behind his compositions while performing which i guess puts more meaning for the songs when heard again. My personal favorites are "King of the Jungle", "When Love Takes You In" and "I Believe in You". But my current favorite is "Fingerprints". Been listening to this for almost a month now and I am so addicted to it. Hahaha!

Can't wait... =)

fingerprints

I can see the tears filling Your eyes
And I know where they're coming from
They're coming from a heart that's broken in two
By what you don't see
The person in the mirror
Doesn't look like the magazine
Oh, but when I look at you it's clear to me that

I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know it's true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God

Never has there been and never again
Will there be another you
Fashioned by God's hand
And perfectly planned
To be just who you are
And what He's been creating
Since the first beat of your heart
Is a living breathing priceless work of art and

I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know it's true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God

Just look at you
You're a wonder in the making
Oh, and God's not through, no
In fact, He's just getting started and

I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know it's true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God
You are covered with the fingerprints of God

whew!

I am wounded, perhaps burnt by embolismic expectations from my family, friends and other relationships. Perhpas, I am tired of trying to be the best. But when I come to think that I want to become a lawyer, it eliminates my frustrations. - Justice George A. Malcolm, Associate Justice, Supreme Court of the Philippines

two friends

Sometimes you'll just get to wonder why there are relationships that just can't move from one kind to another.

Sometimes, it's more than incompatibility.

And sometimes, it's not a matter of not telling the person how much you've felt or your intention of transforming it from friendship to something else.

It just feels like there something is holding you from taking that step to cross the line. Or atleast entertain the thought of crossing that line. Fear maybe--that you simply content yourselves with what is available instead of taking the risk of losing it altogether. Fear to later find out that you weren't really meant to share a love relationship and simply end up breaking the heart of a friend.

Or perhaps it's the familiarity that two good friends share throughout almost a decade of friendship and care.

We connect too much on the gut level that we both know we can't force it.

Perhaps, we're really better off like this.

fortune photos

My brother has perspective.

I was checking my multiply account when I came across these uploaded pictures taken by my brother for UST's brochures, posters, and whatever have you. More than nostalgia seeing UST's buildings, I was filled with pride for Jon's talent. And he has a lot more.

I am a proud ate. =)

from daddy's little (grown-up) girl

If there would be one person in my life that I rarely talk about, it is my papa. Ironically, he's one person who occupies a big chunk of my heart.

Perhaps, through the years as I was growing up, I've learned too accustomed to a "no dad" at home. For 13 years since I was nine, my father was away. He was an Overseas Filipino Worker in London. He works in one of the posh hotels there. He has already learned to speak like the Brit, or else , according to him, they won't understand. =) He was a very good provider and kiddingly according to my mother, he loves his kids more than he loves his wife. At the best he could, he was doing "remote parenting".

Needless to say, I am my dad's favorite. I knew it eversince. Or perhaps, I was just lucky enough to have spent the most time with him as compared to my siblings. For nearly half of my life the memories I have were with Papa. He was the one who was rearing me when I was a young girl. We were together for 2 years or so in the province when he thought of putting up a poultry. He taught me how to read, to cook chicken egg by simply putting it on top of steaming rice,and pray before going to sleep. He was the one who patiently takes care of me whenever I would be sick. I hate having a fever when I was younger since I always get nightmares, but each time I would wake up, I would see Papa beside me and I would be fine just snuggling closer. I learned to enjoy the bookstore beacuse of him. Sometimes we'd sneak from mom to visit a bookstore where he'll read and read, while I attempt to read and later play. (I now can stay in the bookstore to read and read, hehe) He knows how I look forward spending Sundays with him. We'd go to a zoo, a park or just stay home and he'll prepare a feast.

However, sometimes when life's realities start to bite, decisions although tough are needed to be made. In the years my Papa was away, yes, a void was created and left at that. But no matter how much the pain may have been for spending a long time without him physically, I know that our love is much more enormous and powerful to redeem the hurt.

They say that the bond between a father and the daughter is special. I believe so. There is just such this understanding that only the hearts learn; a language that only the two of them speaks even without words.

Pop, Happy Birthday and Happy Father's Day too. I owe you a lot. =) I love you more than words can say. Get well soon and take good care of you.

Hugs. Tighter hugs. Mwah.

fortuitous event

Fortuitous event - an event which cannot be foresen, although foreseen is inevitable (Article 1174, New Civil Code of the Phlippines)

The clock reads 4:20. It was a warm, humid Thursday afternoon and I am rushing for the first meeting in my Torts and Damages class at 4:30. I went up the second floor of Claro M. Recto building to check my room assignment.

"104. Ok, downstairs."

Then I saw a notice which contained my course title, professor's name and ASSIGNMENT: first page of the outline. At the lower right side portion was the date of the immediately preceding day written in blue ink.

"Whew! He is not coming to class!" I went to the Dean's office and asked for the attendance sheet, when the clerk said: "Andito si sir."

Whhhaattt!

Does that mean that assignment is for today's class? On the first meeting?! My head began to panic. My clock reads: 4:25. How could that be? Did I miss that notice last night? I was here for my International Law class and I was sure I wasn't able to see that bill. I have no time to argue with the Dean's office. So, I rushed to my assigned classroom and asked my classmates about the outline. Most of them said they just learned about it only on the same day. And in a split of second, a tall, buffy guy in white polo shirt entered the room. He's here!

He took his place on the platform and started calling the roll. Lucky for me, my seatmate is nice to lend me her photocopy of the outline. While waiting for my turn to be called, as he still asks personal details (perhaps to get to associate us with certain facts), I was reading through the paper in front of me and remembers as much as my brain can.

Then we saw him held the outline. Anxiety started to spread among us. "Sh*t! His up for recitation!" A few of my classmates were called, most sat down with no answers to my professor's query.

To cut the long story short, I was called for recitation. Waahhhh!

Part of law school's training is recitation. No law school is without it. It's the Socratic approach of learning where the professor asks pertinent (sometimes impertinent) questions to check what the student knows and to train them think on their toes.

This is something I missed for the past almost 2 years, but to be caught unprepared is a different story altogether.

I was standing there for almost 10 minutes, trying to gather my thoughts, compose my self, deliver my answers to the professor and wishing he'd ask me questions with which I have answers. The first few minutes or so was manageable. I have answers to his questions which I suppose are correct as he picks up the discussions from there. I can feel his excitement thinking I studied. My head is screaming: "No, sir, you are getting the wrong impression here. I do not know anything."

There is a rule we law students adhere during recitations: Less talk, less mistakes. But in this case, I cannot. If I do not talk I won't get a grade. Then, he asked me to discuss a case which I can only relatively remember from my previous subjects. It's about a driver of an automobile hitting a pony causing the rider to be thrown away, thus entitling him for damages. But I was mixing the facts of the case. God, I am incriminating my self.

"Miss De Chavez, did you read the case?"

"Previously, sir."

"Previously. Hmn...How about recently?"

"No, sir". My mind is screaming: "How could I?! I just saw this freaking outline just as you came in this freaking classroom!"

I can exercise my right to be heard (which I did when he asked why). But in law school recits, there is no such thing as a valid excuse. They are all the same bananas--EXCUSES. Dura lex sed lex. The law may be harsh but it is still the law. In law school, no one is invincible.

Just when you least expect it. Murphy's law perhaps. What a luck (or badluck)! Whatever you call it. I hope I got an equitable mark for that very embarassing moment. Nothing to rant about really, been through this several times. But I guess, I have to get the hang of it again. My fortuitous event for my first semester as of my return to law school.

I hope that never happens again. Sigh.

hypercritical

I am my worst critic. Couple it with becoming semi-perfectionist. Aarrgh! Not a very good combo.
But I am learning to be kind to myself now, with the belief that I deserve less spanking especially from me. =)

on the eve of day one

I was reading through my abandoned Friendster Blog and I a came across an entry I wrote more than a year ago. It reads:

My Friendster Horoscope for today (tonight) reads:

"The Bottom Line
It took a while, but finally all your hard work has paid off. A long calm is coming.

In Detail
It's human nature to dream, and to at least try to make those dreams come true before we're done with our time here on Planet Number Three. Your chance to turn one of your dreams into a goal and to tackle that goal with your usual meticulous attention has now officially arrived -- and if you're dealing with the department of long-distance travel, higher education or spiritual quests, you'll have all the heavenly help you could ever ask for to get the show on the road. Go for it."

If this must be true, thank God. (I don't intend to be blasphemous.) I just hope things will start working for me. As the adage says: After every rain comes a rainbow.

I just find it funny that I would like to believe that this fortune statement blah blah should be for today. Perhaps, I am just thrilled by the fact that first day of school year 07-08 starts tomorrow. Nothing really big, but it just actually feels weird actually going back to school AGAIN. ;) My summer class was a warm up, though. But the real battle commences tomorrow. I do not want to hype it, but I just want to say, I am looking forward to it. =) Go for it school girl...Hehe! Wish me luck, everyone.

french film festival

I am a sucker for foreign films especially during film festivals. Whenever I get the chance to watch one, I grab it at once. I see this as a glimpse in the host country's culture culture and it's fun. =)

The French Embassy in the Philippines and Alliance Française de Manille organized the 12th French Film Festival which will run from 07-17 June at Shangri-la Plaza in Ortigas. This year's festival is paying tribute to Philippine cinema by the projection of Filipino films such as "Putot" by Jeck Cogama which was included in the official selection of the Clermont-Ferrand Short Film Festival, as well as "Kaleido" by the director Brillante Mendoza, the Filipino representative in the Directors’ Fortnight of the Cannes Film Festival 2007.

Please find the sched below. For more details log on to http://alliance.ph.

Come and let us celebrate culture...



List of Films:

Movie 1: Arthur and the Invisibles by Luc Besson
Movie 2: Fair Play by Lionel Bailliu
Movie 3: Gamblers by Frederic Balekdjan
Movie 4: March of the Penguins by Luc Jacuet
Movie 5: Not Here to be Loved by Shepone Brize
Movie 6: OSS 117 by Michel Hazanavicius
Movie 7: Sequins
Movie 8: The Ax
Movie 9: The Little Lieutenant by Xavier Beauvois
Movie 10: The Perfume: Story of a Murderer
Filipino Movie: Manoro by Brillante Mendoza, Kaleido by Brillante Mendossa, Putot by Emmanuel Cogoma

postscript

I received the article below from my climbing buddy, Ditas. It is a post election message from Martin Bautista, a senatorial bet from Ang Kapatiran. She wrote: "Hopefully our new public officials, elected whether by legitimate or unscrupulous means, would learn what the real essence of public service is all about. And may this serve as a lesson to all Filipinos."

The election is over. It is time to examine, and to both skeptics and sympathizers alike, explain my participation in it.

I gave up a flourishing medical practice in America, joined Kapatiran and ran for the Senate because I wanted not merely to prove a point, but to live by it.

And the point is this: we can change our country, help our people, not by talking or theorizing but by actually doing something about it. One cannot simply make a statement. He must apply it in his life, by example, by involvement, by action. Our political campaign was such a statement.

Did we succeed? We did not get enough votes for a seat in the senate. But we did get the attention of the electorate and, more importantly, we made people aware of alternative solutions, better political options.

We demonstrated that it is possible to conduct an open, honest, vigorous campaign on programs, not personalities.

We showed that there is no need for false promises, political gimmickry, immoderate spending; but that there is a need for continuing communication, defending and justifying our positions and priorities.

Our fundamental premise is this: Politics is not a means of livelihood. It is not an economic investment that will pay off in future material gain. Politics is a way of giving, of sharing, of helping. It is not soliciting support but providing it. It is not about rendering service in the senate when elected, but rendering service now, in the present, in this time and place, in one's capacity as a candidate, a citizen, a Filipino of compassion.

If we have, even in a small, tentative way, we have redefined politics in the Philippines, then we have been fully recompensed for our efforts. The accomplishments of our greatest heroes cannot be judged in the simplistic terms of triumph or defeat. Like Burgos, Gomez and Zamora, the Kapatiran candidates won no instant victory. But they achieved a beginning, advanced the cause for reform, and awakened a hope that such reform is possible.

A personal note of accountability. We received donations from many sectors of society. Added to our own private contribution to the campaign, the total amount exceeded our modest campaign expenses. The balance we shall turn over to Gawad Kalinga in accordance with our conviction that politics is not an enterprise for profit.

Finally I wish to extend my sincere appreciation to all the men and women of goodwill who stand with us in the common belief in a Filipino future. "Maraming salamat sa inyong lahat"

focus on your dreams

"Hi there! Classes are starting June 9.", the text message from my classmate in Legal Forms read. I just learned over lunch that school is starting this Saturday. All this time, I am actually expecting it's going to be next week. Well, guess it's a way of cutting short my anticipation for it. Hehe! I am raving about going back to school though I have a packed full-week schedule. It's gonna be tough but surely its going to be fun as well.

I can hear myself: "Another sem closer to the dream..." This statement thrills me, tell you. It's sending chills down my spine just like when I first entered law school. That statement seems like prophecy and so I want to believe. =)

During my time off, I have been of course, resting and at the same time preparing myself for the demands of law school altogether. In one of the many conversations I had with myself, I remember advising me: "Faith, focus. Just focus, that will spell the difference. Patience and perseverance are a given, but most importantly FOCUS."

For the past two months, after I left Philam and realized how it actually felt to not receive a paycheck every end of the month, I started sending out resumes to A LOT of companies and law firms with the prayer that I get employed by any of them. Some replied. Some scheduled me for interview. I thought I'd gonna be hired by a couple of them. Bottom line: None of them hired me.

I never had any problems with getting a job or bumping into opportunities. I am confident of my qualifications and skills but for one reason or another, I end up not getting the job offers. I let the blow pass perhaps because I take these as practical signs that I am made for something else. That am actually entering a season of preparation for the real thing. =) I take these turnout of events as God's answers to my long time prayer of becoming a lawyer. Guess, it's a way of telling me to focus on what is important this time.

Paulo Coelho perfectly worded it in his novel, The Alchemist: "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." The irony of not getting something is actually getting what you've always wanted.

i've got a crush on you

Yes. He's Michael Scofield of Prison Break. Wentworth Miller offscreen. The first time I saw him on Suspense Channel, he caught my attention. I rarely have crush on people and tell you it sticks. Yay! =) Am having butterflies in my stomach. Yiheee....

it's all about love

In one of Bo Sanchez's talks in The Feast, he talked about the three God-given desires: 1) the desire to live (the desire for protection, provision, survival), 2) the desire to be loved (need to be accepted, loved and that sense of belonging) and 3) the desire to love (the need for a purpose).

In illustrating the second desire further, he said that in case such desire is not fulfilled or not fully met, people tend to look for that love elsewhere. When people who are supposed to give that love are still unavailable, oftentimes, we turn to subtitutes which are not healthy for our emotional well-being. This may come in unlimited forms--drugs, smoking, liquor, sex, shopping, etc. These things serve as an anesthesia for the gaping pain inside--a form of escape. Worse, it may even lead to addiction.

Unfortunately, each of us is attached to one thing or another in order to survive the malnutrition of our hearts. We all miss the point that we are hoping on something that is but a temporary. The good news, however, is that we can get free and be really happy and whole.

It's all about love.

We bend on the fleeting things because of the scarcity of love in our lives, perhaps from our imperfect parents, our abrasive brothers and sister, our critical friends, or just whoever have came past our lives that has hurt us. To cure this, let us learn to fill our lives with healthy, good quality love. Receive the love from the people around us who truly care. Give yourself the permission to love yourself. And most of all open yourself up in the bounty of God's immense love.

I figured it out: It's really all about love.

Maybe, just maybe, when we realized this, we will all be whole and the world will be a better place to live in. =)

reaching the end of the rope

Have you ever felt that feeling when you seemed to have actually let go? When you have finally succumbed to fate? When you are at peace with yourself knowing that whatever happens, things are just gonna work out for the good?

Liberating, isn't it? =)